selamat hari raya + PE 2011

firstly, to all my muslim friends.. have a great holiday! one month of fasting such ain't easy.

the presidential elections are over. it was... well, all i can say is elections suck. i always seem to be upset after voting (although this is only my first time). i think alot of people are not pleased with the results and i'm probably one of those people feeling sore that Dr Tan Ching Bok lost by such a close margin. if only the 2 clowns didn't join in and be extra, most of their votes would have ended up with TCB i daresay. then we would have a completely different outcome.

i know nothing about politics seriously. i also have no idea why i'm even the slightly bit upset when i found out Tony Tan is our newly elected president. they say all these things about TT, stuff like how he thought it was foolish to build the MRT system blah blah blah. then like that how? why people don't say these things before the election. after results out already then post all over facebook. (or maybe people were already posting on facebook before polling day, just that i didn't see it. like i said, i know nothing about politics.) THEN HOW?!

i do sincerely hope that our new president will be able to prove himself worthy of this title. on a completely random note, what the hell you doing arsenal?! 8-2!!! how you end up with a score like that. when i went to sleep, it was only 5-1. sigh!

boomz finale

premier league ended last weekend and chelsea won. hat trick for my captain drogba and my 2 changes, van persie and giggs, paid off. when giggs retire, i will buy a man utd jersey with his name on it. well, the boomz part is that i overtaken doh in our little competition.. 3rd place!! i worked hard for it ok?! i joined the league 2 weeks late and it took me until almost week 'don't know what' before i climbed out of last position.

my fabulous team.

can't wait for world cup!!! (:

the way i am

by ingrid michaelson.

if you were falling, then i would catch you

you need a light, i'd find a match

'cause i love the way you say good morning

and you take me the way i am

if you are chilly, here take my sweater

your head is aching, i'll make it better

'cause i love the way you call me baby

and you take me the way i am 

i'd buy you rogaine when you start losing all your hair

sew on patches to all you tear

'cause i love you more than i could ever promise

and you take me the way i am

you take me the way i am

you take me the way i am

thanks andy, for the song.

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i've always spoke of how i wanted to take risk. well, i am taking one now. there's no way to know for sure but i'm willing to take the gamble. maybe i've overthought it in the past, or just gave myself too many reasons to keep away from it. this time it feels different, perhaps it's because i'm not the only one who wants it to work out.

chasing pavements

today is friday.. and i'm so looking forward to this friday. officially completed my modules for now, so it's holidays until term starts on 23rd feb. quite a week it's been. hours of cramming a whole chunk of statistical formulas and 2 nights at office to rush assignments, it's all done! yay. i reached home at 10.30am today after handing in my last assignment and slept until.. well, now. then guess who's on tv? ellen degeneres. it's one of the few shows i like to catch on tv.. because she's real crappy. her guests today were kate beckinsale(pretty!) and adele, hence inspiring this video..

i've made up my mind

don't need to think it over
if i'm wrong i am right
don't need to look no further
this ain't lust, i know this is love but

if i tell the world
i'll never say enough
'cause it was not said to you
and that's exactly what i need to do
if i'm in love with you

should i give up
or should i just keep chasing pavements
even if it leads nowhere
or would it be a waste
even if i knew my place
should i leave it there
should i give up
or should i just keep chasing pavements
even if it leads nowhere

i'd build myself up
and fly around in circles
wait then as my heart drops
and my back begins to tingle
finally could this be it

should i give up
or should i just keep chasing pavements
even if it leads nowhere
or would it be a waste
even if i knew my place
should i leave it there
should i give up
or should i just keep chasing pavements
even if it leads nowhere


the official music video is cool. choreography is excellent.. very nicely done. the song is actually about a break up.. sad but also makes alot of sense. don't be chasing an empty pavement.. it won't lead you no where. be kind to yourself, do something more worthwhile with your life.

i really miss those weekdays slacking and waiting for the ellen degeneres show to start at 5pm. haha!



19 days to australia.

long live life

gillian admitted to mt. alvernia last evening. received news that javier was born in the wee hours of today morning. everything went very smoothly.. thank God. javier is a very handsome baby.. just like how wei xin is very pretty. no pictures to load though.. i forgot my camera. ): still.. congrates to gillian and tze yong!

headed to the roti prata house for supper.. then home sweet home. a package came for me.. from AUSTRALIA! when mummy first told me.. i thought UWA sent me my documents. but when i saw the package.. i knew it wasn't my papers. THANKS KRISTINE!! I REALLY ADORE THE PRESENT! krist got me the coolest shirt ever. i'm so going to wear it if i ever make it to their concert.

    

*wee-a-weet* thanks again darling.. (:

i was going to leave this for another entry.. but well, what good timing. awesome video.. not the typical coldplay you'd get. like the randomness about it and the jerkiness in their movements. chris martin rocks even if he does awkward actions to match the words.. haha. like when all the members were echoing near the end.. that was fun too. especially love how they included the timpani in the song. reminds me of the time when i played the timpani during central judging back in primary school and i was really proud of myself. mr ong took me off the drums to learn how to play it. i know he was just trying to be encouraging but back when i was 12, it meant alot to me because i felt really important. haha! well, as coldplay sings it.. viva la vida. enjoy!

27 days to australia.

josephine by teitur

dreamt i was back with the pirates and cats of my sommerville
the girl in the alphabet shirt covered in dirt lives on the hill

well, my sweet josephine
are you still racing stray dogs across the old stream?
my neighborhood queen,
are you still kissing cowboys that cry, josephine?

she stole my grandmother's watch, a treasure to touch
to keep time to herself
her mind was a very big house, we got lost there for hours
until august fell

well, my sweet josephine
are you still racing stray dogs across the old stream?
my neighborhood queen
are you still kissing cowboys that cry, josephine?

you say you're alright but josie it's time
you gotta get your feet on the ground
but she says, "no, don't you see we have wings?
it's the funniest thing, it's just that no one knows"
no one knows, sweet josephine

well, my sweet josephine
are you still racing stray dogs across the old stream?
my neighborhood queen
are you still kissing cowboys that cry, josephine?

my neighborhood queen
are you still kissing cowboys that cry, josephine?



i love this song. the lyrics make me picture a black and white film kind of image in my mind. with a cottage by a stream. an old swing in a garden full of daffodils and tall grass. a little girl with long hair playing in the sun, creating her own world and making her own rules. peering through the window pane, very old school furniture in the cottage.. an antique clock and a rocking chair. and a 'HOME SWEET HOME' hanging on the wall above the fireplace. i really enjoy fairytales.. i always hoped to live in one.

hello new year..

i'm so ready for 2009! so many things to look forward to. 2008 was alright.. a few crappy moments but still fulfilling. a round of applause to my girls.. 4 years together and i think this was the best one yet. to have grown and gone through so much with them.. it's been a real pleasure girls. the 'glorious' 21st is over.. almost like i'm stepping into a new phase in life. well, with australia coming up.. it definitely is something new. actually i'm sort of having cold feet now. a bit of fear.. that i'll miss my friends and family terribly and the unpleasantness that gets to me knowing i'll miss out on whatever is going on in their lives.

i've made a few new friends this year. and i think they're a very fun bunch. pity i'll be leaving even before i can get to really know them. i even made a new friend today.. thanks to andy. haha! well, so much for all that.. the new year is about to begin and i already feel i'm running out of time. did a whole list of things that i want to do before i leave.. i'll share another time. for now.. let's just enjoy whatever's left of 2008, even if you're watching the countdown on channel 5. HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

secret garden

rewatched 'jerry maguire'. i admire women like dorothy, because i'm not as willing to wait for men to finally decide on what they want. but i guess it's only in such situations, then "you had me at hello" would really truly be meaningful. good thing she got her fairytale ending in the show. it has a nice soundtrack too. reminds me of.. "That’s the worst , I think when a secret stays locked in within not for want of a teller but for want of an understanding ear.".. read more here. i miss my secret garden.. it's been a while since i looked into it. being in there gives me the nice and cosy feeling and i enjoyed it while it lasted. now the door is shut.. a little too tight i think.


"men are the enemy. BUT... but i still love the enemy."

she'll let you in her house
if you come knocking late at night
she'll let you in her mouth
if the words you say are right
if you pay the price
she'll let you deep inside
but there's a secret garden she hides

she'll let you in her car
to go drivin round
she'll let you into the parts of herself
that'll bring you down
she'll let you in her heart
if you got a hammer and a vise
but into her secret garden, don't think twice

you've gone a million miles
how far did you get
to that place where you can't remember
and you can't forget

she'll lead you down a path
there'll be tenderness in the air
she'll let you come just far enough
so you know she's really there
she'll look at you and smile
and her eyes will say
she's got a secret garden
where everything you want
where everything you need
will always stay
a million miles away

series of (somewhat) unforunate events

to jeremy, my prayers goes to you and condolences to your family. it came as a shock even to me.. i can't imagine what his family is going through. well.. i'm at a loss for words actually. i guess there's really nothing one can do to prepare themselves for such a loss. it'll surely hurt.

read xiu's latest entry and it got me thinking. she puts things in quite an interesting perspective...

"getting into relationship is being too over thought
where people evaluates every little thing
even to the exact kind of thought or emotions they expect from one another
sometimes having unrealistic expectations
causing unnecessary disappointment
hence not getting into any relationship"

"i tink the key is about being balance la
those who just got to know
dun just take it as a contract
trust God to provide u the right person
dun need to rush into things de
give it a bit more time to get to know each other
"Love WILL stand through the test of time de"
as for those already know each other very long kind
stop tinking and evaluating too much and step out in faith"


well well.. i felt slightly convicted. in some ways, i consider too much. all in the name of 'for my own good'. i've regretted once, and now i sense i'm going to regret it again. it's all very déjà vu.. only that this time, there's still room for some change or progress. i hope.

sunday, bloody (awesome) sunday

first things first, the countdown is finally over. so i guess it's time to move along and make plans for my great future ahead! someday i might look back and regret this decision.. or not. i'll leave that to Him.

let's not get all emo-ey and such, there's a couple of things to be happy about..

1) daddy spoke to me regarding my going to australia.. ((: my mind is racing right now.. this is quite exciting actually. it feels good to have accomplished something in my 'goal-setting' card.. haha! 2008 is a super fast year.. keep hearing people say they haven't done anything the past 9 months. well well, reckon i should start planning for 2009 soon.

2) i made a new friend.. erm, well officially that is. i've known his existance since.. i can't remember when also. but yea, we've never really talked, just walk past and smile. hmm.. come to think of it, i don't even think i smiled. anyway, this is timothy.. andy's best friend.

i always thought andy was full of crap.. but tim is worse! and andy laughs at everything he says so it's hilarious to see both of them talking. oh, tim is very nice. andy asked if i wanted to join them for breakfast before service on sunday and tim offered to come fetch me. he's a simple guy.. goes by only 2 rules:
Rule #1: timothy is always right.
Rule #2: always remember Rule #1.

3) got my first-ever customized accessory. it's quite nicely done so i'm very pleased. thank you happy rocker.

on a separate note.. my new 'term' starts this week and i'm already in 2nd year. wowwie.

break

i'm done with exams, first year of university.. waiting and wondering, for now that is. it's already a year since my undergraduate degree course started, can you believe it? it feels like only months have passed. very unlike how it used to be.. when i feel as though i known my friends for years but it's only been months. maybe it's the lack of a 'school culture' or just the fact that this is just something extra that we all took up, with me as the exception. so now, i'll prefer to think i'm working while pursuing a part time degree.. and not refer to myself as a student. that way, i can say that i miss school life. hah.

plenty's been going on. however, plenty can be nothing too. my much-anticipated break is finally here! this one week is going to be exciting. after that, we'll see how things go. i can somewhat predict the outcome.. but i rather not. i'll try to have faith. this is so not me.. i'm definitely not liking it at all. it's simple they say but in such a case, it'll be really much easier to just be honest. if there's not room for that, nothing else will work out. well, that's just my take. yes yes, i know. it all seems very confusing now. but give me time.. i'm giving myself time too. one week will fly by soon enough. think i'm speaking in parables? you ain't hear nothing yet.

at least there's something to look forward to next week.. i can't wait. (:

(and to all who have kept me in prayer the past week.. thanks)

hello '08

found a job.. that pays well, but the responsibility is... urgh! must pull through building fund.. then it'll all be okay.

happy for a friend.. i'm glad that she's glad now.
another one is still hopeful.. but i think she can make it.

new term of school.. no more clare ong. YAY!!! the next unit looks tough.. i need to work smart.

so many things on the list for this year, i'm really looking forward to it.

played badminton with my colleagues yesterday. they booked the courts at smrt bishan clubhouse and zarina invited alon and i to join them. felt super extra at first.. but then shaun(a property officer) started to get us involved in their mini matches. played mostly with crystal(another PO), alon and nicholas(a temp from level1.. i'm at level3). that crystal.. super cute lah. we were in the middle of a match.. then she suggested a new 'rule'. everytime we take a hit at the shuttlecock, we have to name something. well, that depends on the catogory we come up with. nicholas chose 'road names' for one of the matches.. but we ended up naming the mrt stations (lol.. understand that we're working for SMRT). went to eat after whole session.. only me, crystal, alon and marcus. it was good fellowship. hopefully we can hang out together more often.. then it won't be just alon and i all the time. but well, that's another story.

i suddenly miss school so badly. actually not really.. i just miss my girlfriends like mad. my department is male-dominated. 15 guys and only 6 girls! glad i have crystal to crap with me now.. =)

ooh.. met alots of people this week. bumped into naseem at raffles city's toilet during my lunch break. then i caught myra out with hanxian on my way back after taking measurements at city hall mrt. and also saw engwee twice this week at the traffic lights just outside my office building.

i'm quite pissed with the internet actually. been wanting to blog this whole week.. but something will always go wrong when i'm in the middle of completing my entry. argh!

had a chat with an ex member recently.. sort of makes me miss my old cg. come to think of it.. it's already more than a year since i've been in w253. so much going on in the past year.. man, time sure flies.

another old friend looked me up couple of weeks ago. came as a complete shock because i thought i was never going to contact this person ever again. this friend.. erm, we had some misunderstanding in the past.. but it's all cleared up now. i would say he's a problematic guy.. sometimes he will talk, other times he'll be mia. let's just say i can't handle emotionally unstable people. but i'm still glad he initiated the 'reunion'.. he may not be one of my favourite persons, but he's still a special friend.

so much for now. thank goodness no funny problem cropped up.. this is a ultra long entry can!?

last day of 2006. can't say much about it.. it's just like any other day. flashbacks and bittersweet memories of the year's happenings are recurring in my mind. sort of glad the year is going to end.. now i can expect new (and hopefully better) things to come.

this is going to be the last entry for this year. it hasn't been that great... ok, i'll be truthful.. it wasn't great at all. i did grow along the way, but somehow i think this year didn't end with a bang. thank God next year is looking better. i've got many stuff planned out.. things i want to achieve and all. quite exciting i must say. i'm hoping my vision and goals for 2007 will keep me from emoing from this not-so-good closure.

there's no denying this guy is one big hottie. he's a huge part as to why i like 'my name is kim sam soon' so much. i had a realisation about a week ago.. which somewhat explains why i find him so deadly attractive.

he's the splitting image of romeo!


this is romeo.
ok.. perhaps i'm exaggerating a little.

memory is such a powerful thing. it makes it so hard to get over him but who am i to say whether it's good or bad? i guess the main reason i find hyun bin so handsome is because he reminds me of remeo.

this is seriously the weirdest entry i've posted.. haha. i think only suling can understand it.

it's hard to be truthful sometimes. i don't mean that i am deliberately going to lie.. it's just that, the truth can hurt. and i don't want to hurt my friend. how do you tell someone they are irritating? sigh... this is tough. but nevermind, we'll see as things go along.

wednesday was the release of A level results. some of my friends did well, most did so-so. got me wondering.. if i got grades like CCD, i think i'll cry my eyes out. reminds me of the time i got back O's. man.. please don't let history repeat itself. the incident got me emo-ing for almost 3 whole days.. and it sucks lah. i'm dead scared for end year exams now.. even more afraid of the results next march. i can finally feel the heat.. i don't want to pass, i want to do well, excel in fact. a ABC will be almost good enough. let's study smarter... if not those grades will never be mine.

that day also left me emo-ing. not so much because of the results.. but it's because of the people. saw certain people who i have not met for months.. and it's harder to forget them now. not that i'm trying to forget my friends but it's really distracting when you know that you won't be able to see someone for a long time. it actually seems better if they didn't appear before me that day. but of course, i'm not complaining that i saw *ahem*.. it's always good to see him.

i have to go NUS next year.. because i want to be a ogl in my 2nd year. hahaha... suling.. must help me ok? thanks.. =)

it's been a rather emotional week. i'm not refering to major, sudden outbursts.. just having alot of mixed feelings lately. goodness knows why. sometimes i just feel sad out of the blue.. usually happens when i'm stoning.. or waiting. will have flashbacks occasionally, and these memories make me sad. not that they are sad memories, some are nice ones.. but they remind me of certain things that are no longer the way it was, hence the sadness. a few times it was anger.. realised i've been quite moody these past days. easily frustrated.. and thus leading to indifference when that happens. urgh, but i can't help it. i don't like it at all.. hate to be unhappy! worst thing is.. this feeling has compounded within the week.

a thought suddenly crossed my mind.. could i be suffering from depression? haha.. hmm, think not. but i hope i get out of this state i'm in now. maybe it's because i'm turning into a mugger.. and i mean i true-blue mugger! dajie made a new rule in the house.. raisa and i have to study at least 3 hrs per day before we can lay our hands on the computer. all of a sudden i have to cut away about 60% of my entertainment cum social life.. seems like a reason to feel upset. however, i like to study.. so i guess it's not so valid. hmm... oh! maybe i know the cause afterall, started because of an incident during prom. but i shan't talk about it here.

i want school to start like now!!! to get my mind off things. it would be more comforting if i were to be starting a new semester in NUS.. but i guess being a j2 in pj will have to do for now.

suddenly felt like listening to some ska music today.. haha.. no idea why. got introduced to it during 1st 3 months in MI last year.. can't remember all the bands husaini mentioned.. could only recall MXPX actually. ska's cool.. in a way, it helps me to destress. =)

missed the times back in J1.. well, i meant last year.